10. By the time we get to the gig we have worked ourselves up into an Oakland Raider nation frame of mind.
9. Specially trained Latinas can fling a slipper from the cheap seats and hit Security right between the eyes.
8. Once we start dancing, a swinging middle aged booty becomes a lethal weapon.
7. It’s hard to tell the real convicted felons, from the computer folks that look like them.
6. We always insist on being frisked.
5. Toliet plungers will be used as air trombones.
4. Standing in the spit section blows the smoke into the audience.
3. Bad attitudes doesn’t play well with others.
2. Always tell them, “If you want to break my camera, take a picture of your Mama”.
1. Some of us bring our own security.